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Living with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder

Is it possible to live with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder? Am I actually living? Why did I get it? Why now and not then? I can’t breathe. Hyperventilation has taken over. I can’t see. There’s something in front of me but I don’t know what it is. I can’t hear. There is a voice but I don’t know what it is saying. I can’t move. My body is frozen. Here come the images. Firing off like a movie in fast motion. Each scene I am a different age. Each scene is a memory I don’t want to revisit. Now my body is shaking. This is the worst part. It’s violent and travels repeatedly from my head to my toes. How long will it last? I never know. Is my thinking brain on? It is right now to write this. How long will my clarity prevail? I never know. If there is a hell I am in it.

My PTSD and Me – this is my story